Thursday, August 03, 2006

Road trippin' Doujicon- pt (Do you know who the I am? Please tell me)

I had read how cosmopolitan the St Kilda area was with café’s and whatnot so i decided getting a couple of expressos into me would be good for my sans-sleep brain.

Well I walked and walked and everything was closed or lacked a certain essence of French toastiness. After 30 minutes I discovered “greasy joes”. I long blacked it and read the paper while I waited for my food. My French toast came out swimming in syrup and after 2 slices I was done.

At 830 I headed back to motel, for a boost I put “Tribe called quest” on the mp3 player so “Check the rime” y’all.

Everyone was up and ready.

We headed off. Benzin and Owen (they were the soberest) drove and navigated and did an awesome job of it. (I’ll take some credit to because I printed a bunch of maps)

We found the uni, then the car park, the building and the actual hall. What we didn’t find was the table I booked – because they ran out of trestle tables. Sigh – I had extreme concerns about the event because of the oztaku track record, this didn’t expel those concerns. It was 9:45 and things were still chaotic; some volunteers were really cool, like one younger volunteer who spent 10 minutes marching around in a circle like a tin man. He made me laugh. Instead of a big trestle table we got 6 school desks which fit our piece of material perfectly. Though we had to move everything a couple of times
“You can’t sit there, that’s the theatre exit”
“But that’s where we are on the map”
“Well…you can’t”
“Hmm, ok”
I could tell the mature section would have a high level of suckage, the map I got didn’t show that the stairwell completely blocked our view of the general area (meaning unless you walked around the corner patrons couldn’t see us.

We moved again to get closer to the action.
But enough kvetching. (for now)

I quickly chatted with Practice Cactus and with Darren Close. I wasn’t very talkative since I had too much going on. I had fully assumed that I would catch up with people afterwards at drinks; that’s the norm in Brisbane and Sydney (to a degree). However at the end of the day people just disappeared. But that’s jumping ahead.

I’m not going to go through every detail,(thank God) but some highlights/lowlights.

Forgetting my sketch book at home, there were so many great artists attending, I could have come closer to having every aussie artist contribute.

Meeting Kevin Patrick and Phillip Bently. Guys I have great respect for; friendly guys who work for the love of it but work smart and make opportunities. I chatted with them pretty extensively about Sureshot and comics and publishing. Kevin asked for me to be part of a Publishing comics talk which I agreed to and enjoyed. I sincerely hope it gets even a couple of people published.

The mongy who would pick up comics and read them cover to cover and walk off. He did it three times during the day and with my cranky pants hitched up high I asked (I’m paraphrasing) if he would refrain from doing that and leave.

Getting Tonia’s latest book and catching up with her, even briefly. She’s so awesome.

General lack of traffic and not having the brain power to get into deep conversations with anyone

Announcing the Ledger Awards, whilst I didn’t record it here’s a transcript that I made up.

It started with me doing a medley of songs “Hooray for Doujicon!” “Supanova” and “Sexy MF”

Mark – Thanks. Thanks, your warm applause is gratifying. Thanks.

Mark – Wow, 10 minutes of clapping, hardcore. Melbourne rocks.

-After 30 minutes of applause and general swooning.-

Mark – thanks for attending the announcement of the winners of the Ledger Awards

-Half the crowd leave-

Mark – it’s a privilege to be pronounce these titles as Australia’s best for 2006.

Mark – lets start of with PRODUCTION DESIGN OF THE YEAR, the nominees are Glen Shearer and Darren Close for Operation Funnybone , Troy Kealley for Something Wicked and Tonia Walden, Pirates, for various books. And the winner is Glen Shearer and Darren Close for Operation Funnybone

Mark – Glen couldn’t be here because he didn’t know of the event and Darren was busy turning off another website. But congratulations to you both.

Mark – Second category, WEBCOMIC OR COMIC STRIP OF THE YEAR and the nominees are Big Fun Mega Happy Pet Land by Jase Harper, Magellan by Stephen Crowley and and Raymondo Person by Patrick Alexander.

Mark – and the winner is Big Fun Mega Happy Pet Land by Jase Harper. Jase couldn’t be here in person but I have him on the phone.

Jase – Dude!

Mark – Dude! Congrats!

Jase – Dude! Awesome!

Mark – Anything else Jase?

Jase – Dude. Rawk!

Mark – thanks Jase. Next we have SINGLE ISSUE OR STORY OF THE YEAR. And the nominees are "Laika" by Doug Holgate, "The Record" by Christian Read & Tonia Walden, Star Wars Tales #27, illustrated by Nicola Scott and "Seed Dreams" Liz Argall & Matt Huynh.

Mark – And the winner is "Laika" by Doug Holgate. Doug couldn’t be here today because that would involve leaving his apartment but he’s on the phone.
Congratulation Doug

Doug – Thanks you, you ##crsh## ing ##smsh## hole. Eat my stinking brown ##zzpt##.

Mark – Doug you are breaking up, buddy, catch ya later Mark – the nominess for the SMALL PRESS TITLE OF THE YEAR are Happy Birthday Anyway by Matt Huynh, Pirates edited by Tonia Walden and Dreams of Tomorrow edited by Liz Argall. And the winner is Happy Birthday Anyway by Matt Huynh. Matt is currently busy working but he says thank you and his acceptance will take the form of a comic, a sad comic about heart break and loneliness.

Mark – Next we have a big one, INDEPENDENT PRESS TITLE OF THE YEAR and the nominees are Eldritch Kid by Christian Read & Christopher Burns, Platinum Grit by Trudy Cooper, Doug Bayne and Danny Murphy and finally The Crumpleton Experiments by Daniel Reed. And the winner is Eldritch Kid by Christian Read & Christopher Burns. We have Christian on the line, congrats Christian

Doug – Your comics are really ##shizzt## and another thing

Mark – Whoops wrong line! Christian are you there?

Christian – Yeaahhhhh boyeeeee! Big up, g wicked styling, gotta gotta give thanks to Jesus our Lord and Saviour for giving me da talent. Props to the East side posse, Phosphorescent represent yo. To my main man Chris Burns , you da star man. Respect and peace out 2006.

Mark – Coming to the end of proceedings

Masses of applause

Mark – The WRITER OF THE YEAR nominees are Trudy Cooper, Christian Read, and Matt Huynh. And the winner is Trudy Cooper. Trudy couldn’t make proceedings because I don’t really know her so I can’t parody her and she sounds like she could hurt me so lets get to the final category BEST ARTIST.

Mark – And the nominees Doug Holgate, Trudy Cooper and Matt Huynh. And the winner is – Doug Holgate. You still there Doug?

Doug - ##shhhht## smoking, fist swallowing, mouth ##brrrzzt##

Mark – Thanks Doug. And thanks to the 2 of you left.

I couldn’t figure out the timetable and missed the opportunity – no one grabbed me and no one complained so I shrugged my shoulders and went back to selling.

A volunteer asked if I could fill in for Avi doing a talk on Distribution, to be done in 5 minutes. Sure, I haven’t slept for 40 hours and haven’t prepared but that would be fabulous. I do a lot of stuff for pretty ladies-which has lead to me waking up in an ice bath. I lectured web stuff at TAFE for a couple of years and made most of that up so I talked for about 40 minutes and I hope the 12 people who turned up got something out of it. I wouldn’t mind doing some talks next year.

An Actual conversation

Jing - “Hey, do you like Zombies?”
Fucktard - “I don’t dislike zombies?”
Jing - “How about vampires?”
Fucktard - “I don’t dislike vampires”
Jing - “Monkeys? Gypsies?”
Jing - “Violence? Gore?”
Fucktard - “I don’t dislike any f those things”
Mark - “What do you like?”
Fucktard - “Well – a couple of years ago, I discovered that life had no intrinsic meaning. I was depressed and suicidal for awhile. I realized liking anything or disliking anything was meaningless. I don’t care. I make lots of money and have very few expenses-
Mark - “Do you have $4?”
Fucktard - “I could go around the world if I wanted to, I have lots of money. But I don’t want to.
Mark - “do you have $4?”
Jing - “you might like Owen’s book they don’t have any meaning”
Mark curls up in a little ball and pisses himself laughing.
Fucktard - “I’d have to go to the bank and who can be bothered with that?”

At that point I just had to walk away. Cranky Mark don’t sell books.

Orochi was awesome. Just perfect end to the con. Rocked out with my cock out. I just wished it was in the hall instead of the auditorium where you had to sit. But still awesome.

We headed over to the Causeway expecting to catch up with people but it was bereft of comicers. So I was really hoping to chat and drink with
  • Ben Hutchings
  • Dave Blumenstien
  • Dean Rankine
  • Ian Thomas
  • Simon Sherry
  • Tonia Walden
  • Wen
  • MakePeace
  • Ricci Morris
And talk more with Kevin, Gary, Phillip, Darren and Practice Cactus.

Alas, it was for nought. Next Year.

3 days after the event I discover Bruce Mutard and Aaron Burgess were there too. I didn’t even realize. I was hoping to catch up with Dillon and Mandy Ord but they didn’t show up at all (poor Mandy was working and sick).

Beating Dan in a breakdance battle, he was so gob smacked with my moves he forfeited.


G said...

Hey Mark, hopefully we'll get to catch up and yak some at Sydney Supanova? I'm gonna try and make it there.

Cactus said...

I was witness to said "B-Boy" madskillz and do confess it was pretty good...for someone who was hung over and tired.

azahru/liz said...

heheheh, fabulous prize giving.

... it disturbs and amuses me that the random letters I need to write to prove I'm not a bot are evocative of a convention for anime gay porn.

Jase said...


dillon said...

yep, i'm kicking myself i couldn't get there as there were stacks of people i wanted to catch up with, all conviently located in one building but a heavy cold and a baby with a heavy cold made sure i wasn't goin' no place that day. i'm glad everyone else had fun.

Owen Heitmann said...

I seriously took a shine to that nihilist. I genuinely think he might have liked my books if he'd tried them - although I'd claim that some of them actually do have meaning, albeit buried under layer after layer of ironic detachment. I still have no idea what he was doing at a comic convention though.

Mike Hell said...

I think Glen Shearer was there up until 2 or 3?

And nothing scarier than hearing that people want to talk to you. Drinking with how ever I can deal with.

Tonia said...

Sorry we didn't stay - i would have liked to catch up too, but Scott was feeling poorly so we scarpered.

Mark Selan said...

Gary - yeah chatting would be good

Cactus - I'm in my bboy prime

Liz - i can't wait till there is MTV style awards for best kiss, biggest dummy spit. And i have no control over the word verification thingy except with my freaking mind

Jase - I know Dude, I know!

Dillon - It was a big shame indeed, a lot of people had colds; glen shearer and david bird both left early with the sickness. Damn bird flu.

Owen - I think the nihilist is secretly a massive power puff fan and was there to get some fan art

Mike - Yes Mike we would have Words! (like round, pint) and you could explain the whole faces thing to me

Mark Selan said...

Tonia - that's cool. Another fallen to the sickness.

Simon Sherry said...

Yeah, would've been good to have more of a chat than a brief exchange of g'days - but with baby and wife in tow, after con drinks weren't too practical.

That said, t'was a hell of a time, and was brilliant to get to put some more faces to names.

Simon Sherry