Happy Birthday Doug

Three decades back Douglas Hasslehoff Holgate was born.

His father was a Hollywood stuntman who specialised in standing in for driving dogs, Lewis' and Martin's Hollywood or Bust being his most famous role. But wearing the dog costume got tiresome so he travelled to Australia looking for gold. Missing the gold rush by 150 years or so, he met up with the woman who was to be Douglas' mother. She worked in a school for merchant sailors teaching them to spit and sing sea shanties.

Douglas' love of big hats was not diagnosed for 3 years, until then he continually was putting his head in a bucket.
This was remedied though, at the age of 4 he got his first top hat. It was a joyous day, with a lot of joy. Until he lost his hat. Douglas was always chasing little sparrows and in his excitement he'd always lose his top hat. Oh how the tears would fall, and fall, and fall. So for the next 15 years, his hat was tied down with the hankerchiefs he would recieve from his gandmothers every christmas. With his tied down hat, Douglas could again frollick with the little sparrows.

Disaster was met though, when Douglas fell down a mineshaft, and broke both his legs.

He spent 6 months in bed. The little birdies would have to wait. By chance, Douglas found some paper and pencils left behind by a patient named Dorothy, who had quite sadly died of testicular cancer. With the drawing implements, Douglas found he could draw. And draw he did. However once he recovered he put away the pencils, put away the paper, tied on his top hat and started chasing little birdies again.

Years past. Flew past. He attended high school and became quite the star, with his ability to skull a top hat full of beer - little did his peers know that Douglas would mix ginger ale with the beer, in attempt to lessen the effects of the alcohol. Little did Douglas know, though, that he was allegic to ginger beer and would pass out.

A fresh-from-high-school Douglas, wanted to follow his dream of becoming an engineer so he enrolled in a course he thought would be perfect. However, on the first day of his Plant Illustration course he was notably disappointed. Stuck in Newcastle, in winter, there were no sparrows to chase. His top hat was mocked by others so Douglas returned to drawing. His peers were in awe of his skills.

Slowly he met with much acclaim. Relationships grew, partnerships were made, little ships in bottles were attempted but discarded; not for lack of talent - no kind reader - because he was too busy getting it done.

Douglas Hasslehoff Holgate, we salute you! Happy Birthday!